You Gonna Kiss Me, or What?


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By Don Swinney | June 1, 2015

I’ve been a music lover for as long as I can remember. Shortly after I got married I joined three of my male friends and formed a quartet. But none of us played an instrument, so we sang accapella. I always wanted to learn how to play a guitar, but opportunity, time and money never seemed to happen at the time, until I moved to Albuquerque, N.M in 1967. As I was reading the evening newspaper I saw an ad for guitar lessons at the YMCA. It said: “Guitars furnished!” I announced to my family “I’m gonna do this.” Because I didn’t own a guitar nor did I know how to tune one, I thought, “How can I lose?” I learned just how to form a few chords and to plunk along with myself as I sang. Through the next forty years, I’ve formed a music group wherever I’ve lived, when I moved to Abilene, about 10 years ago, I was on the look-out, and found a lovely young married couple. As we rehearsed , I found it difficult to get him to project himself: To sing loudly enough and to exhibit some show-man-ship. Out of desperation, I asked her, “How did he ever work up the courage to ask you to marry him?” She didn’t answer that question, but told me, “on our first date, he walked me to my door and just stood there. Finally I asked him, are you gonna kiss me, or what?” Now, while we’re on the subject of kissing let me tell my story about kissing. The girl I married and I attended the same high school. We walked the same halls for almost three years before really meeting. We met in the foyer of the most popular movie theater one night. Being the out-going person that I am, I stopped her and initiated a conversation. We had a full five seconds to talk before the rest of the family came from around a corner. To my surprise, she didn’t quit talking and join them. We kept talking for another 15 seconds. I decided right then and there that I was going to ask her out. Later, I found out, she was hoping I would. We went out the next Friday night. While we were on that first date I kept on thinking “There is something different about this girl.” This “something different” kept me thinking should I or shouldn’t I kiss her? Because I didn’t kiss her she interpreted this as a lack of interest. Silly girl. On the next Monday, I asked her to go out Tuesday. We went to a drive-in theater. While the sun was still out, I reached down, put my hand down, and tilted her head up and… Got the dryest kiss I’d ever gotten from any girl. I leaned back and thought: “What happened?” A little later I repeated my action. Same result! Still later at her door. Same result! But that “something different” feeling about her made me think that this problem could be fixed. But I didn’t know how. Very shortly later, we were out with two couples – a triple date! This didn’t keep us from finding our favorite making out spot. All of a sudden it dawned on me what was wrong with her kissing. Fortunately, I handled it right. I whispered in her ear, “Why don’t you open your mouth when you kiss?” She whispered back, “I didn’t know I was supposed to.” Next kiss: Walla! Problem solved!! She had dated so few times, she didn’t know how to kiss! I was proud to be her teacher! That was 62 years ago. And we still practice several times a day.